Lessons from my grandfather

My grandfather was a gifted gardener. After he retired from the Bremerton Naval Shipyard (prior to that, he was a Merchant Marine and traveled the world), he spent most of his waking hours in the garden. At dawn, he'd step out onto the back porch, look out over the Olympic mountains, and take three deep breaths. And then he was off - picking peach curl from his beloved trees, planting seeds, weeding, giving special attention to his infamous Roma's or Golden Jubilees, chatting up the neighbors, the garbage collectors, the mentally challenged man named Roy who walked by several times a day...

I don't have a lot of childhood memories, but there are enough pictures of me in the garden with him to trigger at least a few. We'd sometimes cloud watch together and find pictures in the sky. I know he'd sing, "Don't sit under the apple tree, with anyone else but me..." The Gravenstein apple tree is still in the Northeast corner of the yard; I'm not sure whether he or his dad planted it. I'd climb to the top with a book and read - the view was spectacular, the branches placed just right for sitting, and when in season, I'd savor the sweet/tart flavor of the apples - still my favorite of all the varieties.

He taught me about fairness, about honesty, about integrity. We're all equal. Don't lie. Be respectful. Patience offers many rewards. Pay attention to the details; observe closely - and from afar. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Realize that the limitations of others can be a gift to the rest of us. Share your wealth, in whatever way that shows up, and yourself. Care deeply. Be considerate. Be who you say you are.

These were good lessons to learn and have served me well throughout most of my life. I'm so grateful for the friends I have who give so generously of themselves, who support me in times of need, who care deeply. I value their honesty and integrity, and I'm happy for the gift of their love and concern.

My grandfather died at age 70 when I was just nine, and I have few close relatives left. While my childhood was not idyllic by any stretch, I do know that my time in the garden with him was truly meaningful. I think he was most happy and at peace there, growing things, creating something from nearly nothing, making connections, sharing his wealth.