How good can you stand it?

My idea of bliss

My cousins and I met this morning for our semi-annual Christmas breakfast at Fishermen's Terminal. Pondering the lengthy menu, we all noted we don't eat much for breakfast these days, but it was still a good idea. It's not quite a tradition but gives us quality time together, a rare thing these days. 

There were fewer of us this year. Over warm citrus scones, we reflected on our family. One cousin recently turned 60, and we noted how she's now lived longer than her mom and two sisters—gone before they turned 60.   

We acknowledged how grateful we are. We're generally healthy in mind and body, working, and in relationships that work for us. And we weren't cursed with addictive or destructive patterns like some who prematurely left this plane. What a gift.  


Creating more good

We're now in the throes of the holiday season... a time for giving as well as receiving. While I consume less than I used to, I find joy in finding just the right gift for someone I care about. And, I find giving so much easier than receiving. Part of emotional growth is learning to accept a gift graciously, even or especially when not reciprocated, whether it's a wrapped package, a compliment, or an act of kindness.  

What helped? Understanding the law of circulation: it feels good to give, which has a ripple effect, and if we give and don't receive, we'll get depleted.  

Acknowledging our good

Whether a daily gratitude practice or just counting your blessings as you see them, good begets good. As is true for most of us, my life is hardly perfect, but it's the hard things that ultimately make it better. Moving through a challenge, diving into a problem, navigating a hurdle... those bring meaning and purpose to our lives.  

When we know this, our lives get better. How you ever said, "I'll be happy when..." or "I'll be happy if..." It's a never-ending pursuit, and rarely brings happiness. 

Happiness is right here, right now; we choose. If it's elusive, look at how you fill your time, who you spend it with, and your expectations. You might find clues. 

Good perspective 

Many of us look back at the year in December. Radio stations play top songs, writers and readers share book lists, newspapers review top stories. Before setting goals or intentions, it's useful to take stock. 

• What worked well for you this last year? 
• What are you most proud of? 
• What do you want more of that you started? 
• Are there lessons you learned from what didn't work? 

Please don't lament or shame yourself if you didn't achieve your desires; it's easy to be optimistic about what we can accomplish and forget to account for real-life twists and turns. Look for what you learned instead.  

How much good...? 

So... How much good do you want in your life? What brings you meaning? How would it feel live in bliss? Do you know what this looks or feels like?   

For me: outside, in the woods or on the water. Sometimes in meditation or when I reflect and write my gratitude lists. Spending time with people I love. Diving deep into something new. Laughing. ...   

Bliss is fleeting but so delightful as it melts into contentment. 

Define it. See it. Create it. Own it. And when you can, just be it.  


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