Professional coach... a work in progress

I am learning.

I just wrapped up another three-day intensive training weekend, where my cohorts and I were each encouraged to claim for ourselves the designation of "professional coach." For the first time since I started the program, it felt like it fit. I can see the efficacy of the learning process as I build on my skills and talents. I can see and feel the value of the coaching process, and trust that it works - even when there are more skills to know, try and own.

And so I came up against my first big challenge outside the confines of my peer group just a day away from the non-stop skill-building weekend. The words "coach fail" come to mind, but I'm going to give myself more of a break than that and just own that I was slow to recognize, after a few unsuccessful questions, that sometimes it's appropriate to say, "let's wait." But I did, and follow up can come later.

Coaching is a powerful process and can move us forward when we're struggling. But sometimes life shows up and there's a better time. This is perfectly OK. Circumstances can take us by surprise and just sitting with something might be exactly the right thing to do before we can start to process, let alone think beyond our immediate next steps.

I do look forward to coaching questions becoming more intuitive. I always self-evaluate so I know there are other questions I could have asked (or just stopped sooner), or offerings that may have been better left unsaid in an effort to be 'helpful'. But while not displaying my ideal coaching practice, I am nothing if not empathetic. And very human. This, too, is good learning for me, and I will both recognize this sooner when it comes up with future clients, and I can think about how I might 'be coach' in a similar setting.

Compassionate detachment. Holding space for someone when the road ahead is too foggy to see. Gently asking questions to move beyond circumstances. Recognizing appropriate timing and the right questions. Managing transitions to see past the edge of awareness. Noticing. Witnessing life as it happens.These are all part of the coaching space. What isn't is trying to fix, advise, or suggest. That said, I don't have to be a perfect coach, just as I don't expect my 'clients' to be perfect clients - and no matter how far along I am on this path, we will learn from each other. It's about the synergy, the partnership, that makes it work, and creating a relationship built on trust.

My ability for deep compassion is a gift and I acknowledge it as such; but just as it's a strength, it has the potential to trip me up.

There is forward movement. And for now, that's enough.